HOW MY HEART BEHAVES

A cold heart will burst
if mistrusted first.
A calm heart will break
If given a shake

LISTS

Movie: "Life isn't just about death. It's about the living." -My Girl

Future Purchase: Chevy Volt on a Series Hybrid

Spiritual Thought:
Life is more than death. Life is mortality. It is a chosen state to which we all came into: to live a life of choice and enduring to live God's will. We are here to be tested upon our responses to our trials and blessings. We will be judged according to how much faith we show in our actions to better ourselves, and the selflessness we portray through the process. We will return again to the presence of our God, and take the experiences with us to continue serving his kingdom of glory.

HoPe:
That I will have twins. Supposedly it's our generation to have one, and my cousins haven't popped out any yet so.....maybe grandma saved those genes for me. Kind of a silly request, I know ;)

Ice Cream:Ben and Jerry's Fish Food
Provident Living:
AIA YAF Publication design editor
Designing Bamboo Furniture for the Solar Decathalon 2009 (Actually will be built)
LEED Accreditation Exam
Knitting my first blanket
Phone Calls (this one never sounds like a challenge, but it really is difficult to keep up important relationships without them! And so hard for me to talk on the phone!)
Trying to learn some piano..
Eating Healthy
Training for Half Marathon!
Keeping my Budget
and much more mental improvements....

Prayer:
I never get answers during the act of praying. I sometimes get direct council from reading scriptures, and the other portion of times am just reading to use what I learn to apply to other situations. I often receive answers by living out my life. By serving others, making educated decisions, counseling with others, and forward motion.

Friend:
Jaime Dewaele
Thanks for grocery shopping and visiting me!


Playlist:

you should see the stereogum.com mp3 player here if you have flash

LIBRARIES OF THOUGHT

I've realized something about men. Well, fathers mostly. After a lunch at a cafe I observed a father opening the door for his relatively bouncy 8ish year old daughter. He directed her to the pastries counter and continued to help each other pick out a treat. He kneeled beside her with his arm around her waist, pointing at each option. The way he held her and looked at her was with such admiration, and she the same. Moments like these with their fathers can do a lot for the daughter's confidence in life. For a daughter to always be reminded that she deserves the best of her father's attention, and also his thoughtful notions. I think a lot of little girls (with good balance, so they are not brats:) need to believe for a while that the world of their father revolves around them. As a father, the greatest morals that you can give your daughter are the ones they show them through love and example. Why not be the best man that she knows? Most importantly, daughters must hold the highest standard for their husband, and the model for that high standard should be her father.

This week (actually wrote this three weeks ago, but only now I'm posting!) we were asked to learn and focus upon the topic of prayer: How to pray with most respect to the Lord, as well as being able to pray for others before, or sometimes solely praying graciously for blessings. Here are a couple of things we can focus on while praying both at morn and night -- preceding and succeeding our daily life:

• Reflect on those occasions when we have spoken harshly or inappropriately to those we love the most.
• Recognize that we know better than this, but we do not always act in accordance with what we know.
• Express remorse for our weaknesses and for not putting off the natural man more earnestly.
• Determine to pattern our life after the Savior more completely.
• Plead for greater strength to do and to become better

I've had a lot of reflection and trial and error with this since then. The greatest form of getting "answers" from the Lord will always be my own process of thought and decision. Rarely do I feel direction from any other place. As long as I am focused on the right things, I will be forced to make good decisions for me and for my future family.

VALIANT VIRTUOUS VICTORIOUS

We often make decisions based upon whether it is socially accepted and politically correct. I am certainly and undeniably affected by these two factors. It makes my decisions extremely difficult, and the voice of the Lord decreasingly audible.

I am in the middle of deciding where to go to school. I know that I must. I have been prompted to go, and all other reason agrees. Money dominates. So does location. And also program. I'm trusting that whichever one I am supposed to continue education opportunity will open up. And all other problems will be dissolved as a product of maintaining faith.

"My name is Jehovah. I know the end from the beginning; therefore, my hand will be over thee." Abraham 2:8

Something I pondered in church this Sunday:
An understanding that a leader loves you right away helps create an immediate and trusting bond. It is easier to follow their example and instruction if this type of loving relationship is established - no question. This is very easily seen in the church leader types-pastors, missionaries, but more predominantly (for me) in the way the president and apostles in the LDS Church show charity-or the purest and most selfless type of love.

On top of these random thoughts, here is a possible complete one, quoted by a friend who is "easy to read". I hand-wrote an entry on this that I will hopefully type so that I can share my return thoughts.

"There are three time based lenses through which we can live our life. We can live in the past, in the present, or in the future; or perhaps I should add a fourth one because idealistically you learn from the past, live in the present, and prepare for the future. Realistically, I kick myself for the past, enjoy a few moments, and I obsess over making the future excellent. "
"Rationale also tells me that life is not a race, and everything will come in due time. Because I trust in God, all things will work together for my good. Trying to do it all on my timing and in my way will stifle growth and will stop the Atonement and the Lord’s hand from working in my life."

PATIENCE WITH A SMILE

As I was listening to some General Conference talks today, I was most taken back by a story by President Monson. He told of his life and the service in the church to which he was called. At 22 he became a bishop, and has served in leadership positions ever since. I am 22 and yet my heart will take much time to prepare to be minutely worthy and humble.Forty-four years ago, he was called to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. His faith, and the faith and confidence of his wife is something that I am eager to obtain. I fight my inner motives everyday so that I may have the right ones. I wonder if I will ever stop these cogent debates with myself. I know it will soon come natural, and I know the steps to take. I want to take strides, but I must lay line upon line. What faith we all must have in making decisions?--what patience?--what confusion when interupted by Satan's tongue while striving to hear the soft whisper of the Spirit?

Helaman 5:12
And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.